You got to have rules

There were rules. One of them was that before you kicked someone’s door down you had to knock and say “It’s the British army, we’ve come to search your house.” We had to do that three times before we kicked the door in.

We rolled up outside, as quietly as we could, tapped as lightly as is possible on his door, whispered “Its  the British army, we’ve come to search your house.” as softly as you can imagine. Three times. We had to stifle our giggles. We took the door off its hinges with a baton round and stormed up the stairs.

He slept with a nine millimetre Browning under his pillow, his finger on the trigger. We startled him so much that his finger slipped and he shot his wife in the face. She made this horrendous gurgling sound and I was almost sick. I couldn’t believe that anyone could be alive with that much of their head missing. He was in shock and Cuddles had to bash him round the head with his rifle butt to get him to listen to us. We tried to get him to open the safe but he was too shaken, we had to take it back to the barracks and blow it open. It was full of drugs and explosives and detonators and money. He got 25 years. His wife died before we could get her to hospital. Her name was Caroline. I don’t remember what his name was.

28 responses

  1. you turned nightmares into powerful writing K. u r amazing

    12.06.04 at 02.27

  2. Holy fuck.

    12.04.01 at 18.05

  3. Ah, another chilling tale my friend. I’m really enjoying these pieces, even if they do give me a bit of a chill. Good work!

    12.04.01 at 17.05

    • thanks – it balances out the soppiness

      12.04.01 at 17.09

  4. Gillian Colbert

    Kyle – Being a soldier often means ending up with your psyche blown wide open and you never saw it coming. My daughter’s grandfather never recovered from Viet Nam. My heart goes out to you and the horrible memories you obviously carry all in the name of service.

    This particular tale is gripping, startling, horrific and extremely well written.

    All the best, my dear,


    12.04.01 at 01.19

  5. Theo Black

    Dear Darling or Bro: Because you have been generous enough to expose some raw, tender, or embarrassing side of your physical, intellectual, or aesthetic being, I have nominated you for the coveted TMI Blogger Award. Look here ( ) for the applicable rules. (Excuse the form-letter, but I have to post a bunch of these.)

    12.03.31 at 20.25

  6. Well written and very sad.

    12.03.31 at 18.48

    • it was tragic, as was the whole thing
      thank you so much for commenting

      12.03.31 at 18.49

      • I can only imagine. Some people have proof that nightmares can come true. I’m sorry you are one of them….

        I really do enjoy reading your work…

        12.03.31 at 18.51

        • thank you so much

          12.04.01 at 11.12

  7. what designs life’s scenarios leave on you (us) – I wonder if life left impressions on us, and we could see them on paper, what would we look like… you seem to have turned things into beauty. I applaud that. Its noble,no? whatever it is its great to read Kyle.

    12.03.31 at 17.46

    • you are so sweet

      12.03.31 at 18.25

  8. TheOthers1

    Poor Caroline. She didn’t even see it coming.

    12.03.31 at 16.57

    • it was a horrible night

      12.03.31 at 17.05

      • TheOthers1

        A true story? I didn’t even realize. Oh gosh.

        12.03.31 at 17.07

        • some of its true – i’m a writer so the truth can go fuck off sometimes – i am glad the tale gripped you though – i was a soldier and we were in northern ireland and i did see and do some awful things

          12.03.31 at 17.10

  9. Excellent story. Last 2 lines… good ending.

    12.03.31 at 16.23

  10. redwheelbarrow1957


    Thanks for following the blog. I Hope you enjoy the work.


    12.03.31 at 14.49

    • your stuff is awesome bryan – i hope you enjoy my work too

      12.03.31 at 14.51

      • redwheelbarrow1957

        I will taking the time today to explore it. I am quite drawn to the piece I “liked” though I am sorry you have to carry that with you.

        12.03.31 at 15.01

        • don’t be its all part of life’s rich pastry

          12.03.31 at 15.06

          • redwheelbarrow1957

            Ah I see you understand the rules. You are good

            12.03.31 at 15.09

  11. wobsy

    Reminds me of the “black and tans”.

    12.03.31 at 14.35

    • we weren’t much better mate – it was the 80s and those republican boys were out to get us and gave us no quarter – i’m not proud of some of that shit but i was just a teenager

      12.03.31 at 14.39

      • wobsy

        ye who live by the sword……..

        12.03.31 at 14.42

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s