Love updated

I have fallen in love with a woman, on my computer. I don’t know why, its her voice I guess, its like ice cream covered in thick, hot chocolate sauce, and I just love American accents. I don’t know her name, so I don’t know how to find her on Facebook. She never responds to me, whatever I say, but she is there every day, and she always says the same thing, in that thick creamy voice of hers: “Avast anti-virus database, has been updated.”

39 responses

  1. I love your humour Kyle 🙂

    12.05.18 at 22.57

    • aw, thanks anette – i love your blog

      12.05.18 at 22.58

      • I know Kyle. I love your too. I wish my blog had your content and your style… Hey I didn’t know you accepted awards 🙂 Love the math you did. I’ve introduced Award Buffets, its gonna mess up your calculuses 😉

        12.05.18 at 23.18

  2. For what it’s worth…leave the Norton Nymph alone and check out the Kaspersky Kitten…she uses much better protection…and keep the AVG Angel too. With you in the middle, you have your own menage a trois….SOL 🙂

    12.05.18 at 15.34

    • fantastic! you have actually made ant-virus-software sexy! that got me quite hot 😉

      12.05.18 at 15.36

      • you seemed to already be ‘in the mood’!

        12.05.18 at 15.37

  3. *grins*Your humor is z best : p

    12.05.18 at 11.42

  4. Epic! I did not see that coming…

    12.05.18 at 08.48

  5. TemptingSweets99

    Haha! 😀

    12.05.18 at 05.53

  6. The slut! I’d say that’s an invitation to sex for sure!

    12.05.18 at 04.25

  7. milfee

    Love it!! that skank visits me on my work computer though, its funny, how you love american accents when most american women love english accensts

    12.05.18 at 02.58

    • its a happy coincidence milfee – what kinda accent have you got?

      12.05.18 at 09.49

      • milfee


        12.05.19 at 01.22


    12.05.18 at 02.13

    • thanks cat

      12.05.18 at 09.48


        12.05.18 at 11.45

  9. ha!

    12.05.18 at 01.18

  10. 🙂

    12.05.18 at 01.09

  11. lol…You love hussys!!!

    12.05.18 at 01.00

    • don’t call her a hussy

      12.05.18 at 01.07

      • I make no judgments…And I personally love hussys, prostitutes, drug fiends, and all other forms of people. 🙂 They are just all cool people with different kinds of lives. But, I won’t call your woman a hussy out of respect for your love for her. For however long that lasts…

        12.05.18 at 01.09

        • i’m gonna get AVG or even pay for it and get the Norton hussy

          12.05.18 at 01.11

          • The Norton Hussy is the way you should go…she’s highly recommended by my husband. 🙂

            12.05.18 at 01.12

            • and he should know 🙂

              12.05.18 at 01.14

              • You have NO IDEA…lol… He is a guy, after all…

                12.05.18 at 01.15

  12. I have the same voice but since you fell in love first, she’s yours. It did not hit me the same way it hit you.

    12.05.18 at 00.38

    • what! she’s two-timing me! the bitch! that’s it, we’re through. I’m going back to that AVG girl.

      12.05.18 at 00.40

      • Seriously, I’m not interested and she never did anything to lead me on. She just says the same thing everyday and most of the time my speakers aren’t even on.

        12.05.18 at 00.41

        • ah, if your speakers aren’t on then that’s probably your wife and she’s probably saying, “get off that couch and get a job”

          12.05.18 at 00.43

          • Naw, she’s happy with the one job I have. You are just trying to change the subject because your Avast girl is spending time on thousands, if not millions of other people’s computers.

            12.05.18 at 00.45

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