the food was awful,
i told her,
the service sucked,
i said,
the restroom was
a total disgrace,
and the parking was
fucked up.

i waited ages
for my meal,
the beer was warm,
the fish was cold,
and what she said
when i complained…
she said “sorry but
i don’t work here.”

more nifty noems


i love you more
than coffee
and ice cream
i love you more
than my shoes

i love you more
than my phone
and my car
i love you more
than the blues

i love you more
than my dog
and red wine
i love you more
than xmas

i love you more
than whiskey
and beer
i love you more
than my x-box

i love you more
than lilacs
and sunsets
i love you more
than the fall

i love you more
than football
and boxing
i love you more
than it all

find more nifty noetry here


One thing
that I have learned
from my mistakes,
is that
I never learn
from my mistakes.

A lover of noetry

he was known for his noetry
and his uncanny ability
to find words that didn’t rhyme
quite exactly

he said that noetry
was nothing like chemistry
where things have to rhyme
most precisely

he was a lover of noetry
and also notography
where finding words that rhyme
wasn’t important

he would write his noetry
while seated on the lavatory
and sometimes he didn’t even
finish them properly

more nifty noetry

Reblog: The cranky dove

Not a noem

find more nifty noems right here

Three noems

1. is this
the shortest noem

2. no,

3. is

more noetry can be found here

I am

i am deeply superficial
i get low when i am high
i am a devout atheist
and i giggle when i cry

i am a cowardly warrior
i feel caged in when i fly
i am a gentle hooligan
and i will live after i die

i am pretty ugly
i am honestly quite sly
i’m obesely  skinny
and i wish that i knew why

The sun has got his hat on?

The sun has got his hat on.
Now that’s a fucking stupid idea,
What would the sun need a hat for?
To avoid sunstroke?
Or in case it rained?

Who let the cat out of the bag?
Well who bloody put it there?
You shouldn’t put cats in bags
In the first place,
That’s just not nice.

nifty noets society