Posts tagged “loss

I found something

i’m gonna lose her mate

What makes you think that?

i found something

Found what?

an appliance, you know, a device

Lot’s of women have those buddy, I wouldn’t worry about it.

no man… i’ve always known that’s all she needs me for

What was it? Some kind of vibrator?

much worse than that mate

What?

a universal remote control!!!


Remembering

i always thought
we’d laugh one day
remembering
the times
we cried

i never knew
we’d cry so much
remembering
the times
we laughed


Today

today everyone looks beautiful
today everyone looks sad
and beautiful
today i got bad news
today i said “fuck it”
today i feel like i could love the world
and not care
if it broke my heart a million times.

i love this song, it was an ‘our song’ once, long ago, for a girl who’s name i don’t even remember.
that’s a lie, i remember.
hello floss, hope you are well and happy and surrounded by people who love you, i am, i learned that today.

tomorrow my life starts anew.


X

we cried tears of words
on the day we had to say goodbye,
it wasn’t like you were dead
and you were always
ten thousand miles away.

we tried to 🙂 and lol
on the day we had to say goodbye,
poured out our tears of letters,
words and emoticons
and our love just scrolled away.

you’re still there on my sidebar
since the day we had to say goodbye.
i left an x
at the bottom of our thread,
that will never go away.


Lost

there is a hospital on the other side of the planet where, every month they hold a memorial service, a memorial for all our lost little ones, for those that never got to grow up, never got to be all they could be, never got the chance. someone took a photo of my lost little one and i want to thank them for that. thank you.


Fuck them

Today some shit happened that left me feeling all sad, but its cool ’cause I know how to handle that kind of fuckery: turn on the playstation, roll a spliff that’s bigger than I am, order the hottest peri-peri chicken money can buy and turn the music  up to fucking 11. I’m telling you, that shit works, drown out any feelings, that will, soothe any aching soul.

Now, I know that this will piss my neighbours off (the music, not the chicken) and I know that they will call the police; after all, my sound system could demolish a god-damn city block, but fuck them. I have to listen to their dogs barking all day and them bickering all night so, likeisay, fuck them.

Anyway, I’m dancing round my little little living room to Professor Longhair, Busta Rhymes, Amy Winehouse and the like, in my underwear, with my teddy and my daft hat on, the mother of all joints dangling from my lips, when the Old Bill turn up. As I answer the door, shuffle decides to play NWA’s  ‘Fuck Tha Police!’  I watch this WPC ‘s face contorting in visible pain with the lyrics and its all I can do not to start giggling. Anyway, at least they don’t come in and find the bag of weed on my coffee table or all the girls tied up in my basement, so I guess I get off light with being told to turn my shit down. All the same, fuck tha police!


Empty

She can still hear him crying. It has been over a year, but she can still hear him. She knows its an hallucination, that it isn’t real but that doesn’t make it stop. There is only one thing she can do. She climbs the stairs, flicks on the light in his room. Its just as it had been on the day he had gone. Untouched. She remembers the sirens, the icy panic, the flashing lights, the hospital and the sorry, pathetic expressions on the doctors and nurses faces. She looks into the empty cot and the crying stops. All she can hear is the wind in the trees and the sounds of her own sobbing.


I felt

I felt so happy that I’d found her.
I feel so stupid now I’ve lost her.

I felt so clever when she laughed at my jokes.
I feel so stupid now she won’t pick up the phone.

I felt so light, now I feel so heavy.
I felt so full, now I feel so empty.

I felt so fulfilled,
Now I just feel horny.

Thanks to  Jane for  the idea.


Can’t believe its been ten years since we lost him

“You feel the pain much worse than anybody else but you see a sunrise as much more beautiful than anyone else.”

~ Spike Milligan


I wish Google couldn’t read my mind so well