Posts tagged “tits

show us ya tits!

i have to say just how lovely it is to have received so many messages asking me to return to blogging. i am deeply flattered.  i truly don’t believe that i am anywhere near as good at writing as some of you make out, but thank you nonetheless. reading your messages made a huge difference to my sense of self worth and my faith in my own skills. thank you all so much (you know who you are).

i was as perplexed as i was delighted to read that people think that i am deep, and as a reflection of such imagined depths, can i say this? send me a photo of your tits and i’ll start posting again.

 

love you all (hehe)


Oh God

oh god!
how i love your eyes,
and your tits,
and your thighs.

oh god!
how i love your toes,
and your butt,
and your nose,

and god!
how i love your armpits
as much
as i love your tits.

oh god!
how i love your ass,
like a cow
loves the grass.

but god!
how i love your tits,
but i
already said this.


Rinse and repeat

your breasts come
with instructions:
kiss them
caress them
fondle them
worship them
press your cock
hard in between them
coat them with generous
helpings of cum
then rinse
and repeat
with your tongue.


Snog

so, this is about 15 years ago, right? and i’m reading frankenstein by this mary something – and i’m nearly at the end and i’m on the tube at the tail of long day’s drinking and working, when i strike up this conversation with this gorgeous brummy girl and we get to talking about books and then movies and then football and then she says to me “if you give me a snog, i’ll show you my tits” so i’m all like ‘yeah, sounds like a win-win to me.’
so i give her a big, dirty kiss, and right enough she lifts up her teralyne aston villa shirt and gives me an eyeful of two of the most perfect titties i’ve ever seen. The next thing i know though, is this bloke, halfway down the carriage, gets up and smacks me in the mouth. I’m all like ‘what the fuck’ and he’s all like some shit about snogging his sister.
turns out she does that shit all the time, just to watch the fireworks.
anyway we both go to it and the old bill are called and the train is held up and everything, and i forget my book and never get to find out what happened to frankenstein’ and his monster.