Straight Tony

We called our mate Tony, ‘Straight Tony’. Originally because he was gay but, continually, because it wound him up so much. When we caught him flirting with a guy, we would stroll up and ask him how his wife was. It was hilarious.

It was back in the days when the pubs would shut at eleven, and he and I would go drink in this gay bar in Clapham that was open til five. I like gay bars: they’re nicely decorated, the bar snacks are better, the toilets are cleaner (if often rather busy) and I rarely get into a fight for chatting up someone’s girlfriend.

One night, Tony had got hold of this awesome Peruvian coke, and I asked him if he could lay a gram on me. “Only if you suck my dick.” he laughed. I gave him one of those looks that say ‘Are you fucking serious dude?” He was.

We found a unoccupied cubicle – nice thing about that bar was that they kept the lavs clean, so I didn’t have to worry about kneeling in a puddle of piss – and I set to it. I reckon guys are good at giving blow jobs, even if we’re not that experienced at it, because we know what it feels like to have a cock. Anyhow, Straight Tony seemed to enjoy it.

Afterwards, while I was snorting a line as long as my arm and as thick as my willie off the toilet seat, Tony giggled and said, “I would have given you the ticket anyway, you didn’t have to suck my dick.”
“I know,” I grinned back, “and I’d have sucked it anyway.”

23 responses

  1. Well BRAVO for you! I’d have sucked his dick just for the fun of it, no coke involved.
    My question though is; how would you rate your dick-sucking on a scale from one 1-10?

    13.01.09 at 21.26

    • ah, that’s not for me to say

      13.01.10 at 03.35

      • Actually it is, since you talked about doing it, I’m pretty sure you have a good idea how good you are. Per example I know I’m a 9.5 and I have references to back it up. πŸ˜€

        13.01.10 at 03.38

        • awesome πŸ™‚

          13.01.10 at 03.59

          • I know :D, like Bette Midler used to sing; Baby when you got it, flaunt it, fault!

            13.01.10 at 06.30

  2. Pingback: A total dick « kyle mew

  3. “…a line as long as my arm and as thick as my dick…” that’s pretty neat Kyle. Great nory!

    12.05.20 at 17.50

    • it wasn’t quite that long – working on my first noem now

      12.05.20 at 17.51

      • Oh good… of course I don’t know the length of your arms or the… well you understand. Can’t wait to see your noem πŸ™‚ Remember to pingback or something… Share your noem β™₯

        12.05.20 at 17.57

  4. Andrew

    Randy Newman’s “You’ve Got A Friend In Me”, would be a good theme song for this night.

    12.05.20 at 17.38

  5. Drug addiction has so many beautiful facets.

    12.05.20 at 17.37

    • i know, illegal narcotics are sooo pretty

      12.05.20 at 17.40

  6. Oooo, I have a thing for men who suck men’s cocks and fuck women at the same time! When I was dazed out on Klonapin I went through a Broke Back Mountain phase — I would watch it over and over. I would fantasize that I was between Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger — that we were all in an elevated and artful relationship together — yeah!

    12.05.20 at 17.16

    • I think I had a dream like that too…

      12.05.20 at 17.39

    • i think, gay or straight, girl or boy, that that is a fantasy we all share πŸ™‚

      12.05.20 at 17.39

    • I have a thing for gay men long before I’ve seen Brokeback mountain, just I dont fantasize to be between them, I prefer to be one of them. Well, I know, I’m a woman, and obviously know what is to have sex with man, but I want to feel it through male body and mind.

      12.05.21 at 14.22

      • i’ve often wondered the same, what it would feel like to be a woman having sex

        12.05.21 at 14.33

        • Pity, that we can’t exchange bodies for a while. πŸ˜€

          12.05.21 at 14.37

          • yeah that would be interesting

            12.05.21 at 14.38

          • and fun

            12.05.21 at 14.38

  7. now that’s what I call friends or you call mates.

    12.05.20 at 17.02

    • it certainly brought us closer

      12.05.20 at 17.06

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